VEGETARIAN?!? i tried, i failed, i'm back

Note: This article reflects my own experiences and thoughts. In addition, it reflects the privilege that I hold economically and culturally to be able to change my diet and choose products that tend to cost more.

So, according to this lovely diagram I found on google, I am currently a flexitarian. I'm gonna be honest, it's been a hard road here. My family is a huge fan of meat and in Middle Eastern food, there is no shortage of delicious recipes. I've included some for your viewing pleasure:

Meat has played an important role in my life and eating habits, but it's always been meat not animals. In the US, most people are completely separated from the production of their food. We go to the grocery store and just buy what we want without knowing where it came from, who produced it, what was used- basically we have no idea of what's behind the packaging. For me, this means that when I used to eat chicken or beef, there was no connection to the animal from which it came- it was just the taste.

There were 4 main events/moments that pushed me towards vegetarianism.

1. FOOD INC. (on hulu)

This documentary is fucking crazy. I saw it in high school and it was like OMG there is so much I don't know and the food system is actually a joke. It came out over ten years ago, but not much has changed. Basically, fast food created an insane demand for uniform meat production, so farms became industrialized, and a few companies (like 5) now monopolize the food industry. It has made unhealthy food cheap and healthy food unattainable for the poorest people. I rewatched on Earth Day and it still slaps TBH.

Basically, once I started learning about how meat is produced, it became a moral dilemma to continue supporting the inhumanity of the mass production farms. I'm sure I saw more documentaries over time that further supported this concept. I also learned how damaging our meat production system is for the environment. From having to grow all that food to feed the animals, to the land they use, to the chemicals running off the farms, to the amount of transportation needed- it's insanely polluting.

2. The Mountain School!!!!

In my junior year of high school, I had the amazing chance to go to a semester school in Vermont that's an organic farm. For the first time, I had a role in growing, harvesting, cooking, etc. my own food- it was one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. One day, we had to kill some of the chickens for food and I went to watch. I'll never forget that. At the time, I thought that if I could watch the chickens struggle and lose their lives, then I understood the cost of my eating meat.

I hid behind this moment for several years. I claimed that others who ate meat were still at the stage of separation from their food, but I had done my work and seen the life lost. It was my validation to continue eating meat.

3. Talking to the Vegetarians...

During the fall of 2019, on a dark and stormy night in Boston South Station, I had my first full dialogue with a vegetarian. Obvi, I have other friends who are vegetarian, but I'd never asked them about it and actually listened. He spoke about the concept of humans believing we have the right to another being's life. Essentially we value our lives above other animals' when we raise them just for slaughter and consumption. I disagree, I believe that life is inherently equal and interconnected.

I used to jokingly argue with my veg friends that if we stop eating meat, we'd put all the animals out of business. Knowing that their life is in our hands because of the hunger we have for their meat has become this gross thought always at the back of my mind. In the last two years, my family also got a puppy. Having his little face around all day has shown me that I could never hurt an animal- I just have to understand that our food didn't just appear in the grocery store, but came from a living being.

4. Trying It Out

During winter break a few months ago, something just snapped into place one night. I made the choice to just quit meat. For two months I tried, failed, and tried again. At home, I was able to eat meat substitutes and make my own food. My family was like, oh that's cute, have fun. But, getting back to my college campus actually made things harder and I ended up going flexitarian. Not gonna lie, I talked a lot of shit about being a vegetarian and occasionally hid my rule breaks from friends. I struggled with having a fulfilling and healthy diet, and that is a greater priority for me. Going flex was the best decision for me because ultimately I'd rather change the pattern of my life than go super intensely for a while then break.

My Flexetraian Rules For Survival:

1. Once per day. If I do choose to eat meat, limit to once per day. This mostly happens from trying to reduce food waste and being a part of family meals.

2. Don't eat meat I can't trace. I can push my fam to buy organic, humane raised, fairtrade, etc. products or go to restaurants with those values, but if I don't know then I shouldn't participate.

3. Eat it all! If I'm gonna eat something, there's no point in feeling guilty or not making the best of it. This also goes for not wasting any meat on my plate. If the animal has already lost its life and the GHG have already been emitted, the least we can do is not waste the food.

4. It's okay to fail. I am one person and it's okay when I can't be my best. Being a healthy person is a complicated and life long process that's different for everyone. We'll just keep working on it. 😘✌🏼

By clarifying what I can do and how to do it, these rules guide me. For me, it comes down to reducing my meat intake, consuming thoughtfully and with gratitude, and holding producers accountable through certifiable standards. I commit to this way of living and I'll keep phasing products out until my values match my action.

So that's my story! PLEASE-- share your thoughts, experiences, recipes, memes, and anything else! Checkout #meatlessmonday for recipes!

XO,

Dianna